11 - The Meaning of Life

The "Good Life."  And "The Meaning of Life."

You would not have wanted to travel so far without coming to that answer, would you? 


(1) Some skeptics say there is no Good Life and no Meaning of Life to be found. Many of them live contented lives. Yet, others say that those who maintain meaningfulness as paramount seem happier, less bitter. (Also, skepticism is a self-contradiction, as explained in the Chapter, "Why I'm Skeptical about Skepticism.") Saying there is no answer is not an answer when there is no proof that there is no answer. Besides, it is more fun to make an effort to answer life's most lasting questions.

(2) Aristotle defines the "Good Life" as one with virtue, health, wealth, family, friends, and longevity. St. Thomas Aquinas defines the Good Life as one with faith, reason, and virtue. Many other philosophers agree that the moral life is, or is a major part of, the Good Life. Living virtuously is one of the most important elements of enjoying life. When we have respect for ourselves for living up to our own standards, we can feel we are enjoying the Good Life.

Finding and living the Good Life is an important aspect of finding Meaning in Life. Whatever else the Good Life might include, moral living is central. One cannot be truly happy without it.

Some argue that greed, not morality, is the secret of happy living. However, recently, there have been studies that show, after about $50,000 per year, wealth does nothing to increase happiness. We all need material survival and enjoy comfort, but after a certain point, added money does nothing to improve a sense of being satisfied with life. (See also, the Chapter on "Egoism" for a discussion of the contradiction contained in selfishness.)

If moral living is needed for the Good Life, and the Good Life is needed for the Meaning of Life, then moral living must be needed for finding Meaning in Life.

(3) One of the best insights into the question Man's Search for Meaning comes from the book by that name, written by Viktor Frankl. A psychiatrist in Germany at the beginning of World War II, he and his family were violently taken to a Nazi prison camp. He was immediately separated from his wife and children, and then was sent to the men's work camp. Years later, he learned that his family had been gassed immediately.

He survived in the camp for two years. The first half of his book documents his struggles, both physical and psychological. He maintained his balance by looking forward to being reunited with his wife and children and to re-writing his book. The manuscript had been taken from him at the time of the arrest. In those days before digital copies and photocopies, the typed version was the only one. He would have to reconstruct it from the beginning.

Hope of being returned to the wife and children he loved and the work to which he was dedicated kept him level-minded. He imagined conversations with his wife. Some in the camp coped amazingly well, others in the camp lost all hope, and some died slowly because of a lack of will to live. The rigors of the camp, the hard work, the starvation diet, the filth, the long work days, all weakened both body and mind. Many died. Others, considered useless, were taken off to be gassed.

After two years, relatives were able to raise enough money to buy Frankl's freedom. Alone, he moved to New York City. There he began to re-build his life. He developed the method of psychology that he called Logotherapy, the study of meaning. As long as one has a meaning for which to live, one can have hope, and shape a life of happiness.

The second half of his book explains his theory of the meaningful life being the best. As long as we live with meaning, we can live well. The meaning may shift over time, just as he had to shift from finding meaning in the hope he would find his wife. The source or goal of meaning can change; the fact of living with meaningfulness should not. Through his therapeutic method, he was able to help many other survivors of camps who by then lived in New York City. He helped those who had lost everything, possessions and family and friends. He was a deeply religious man but did not impose his religion or having a religion on his patients.

I have found that everyone who reads this book is deeply moved. Frankl's strength gives all of us insight and respect. Each of us hopes we can find a similarly strong sense of meaning.

(4) What are some of the aspects of life in which humans find meaning? Freud offered (a) love and (b) work as the goals of living. Yet, statistics show that barely half have happy marriages, and fewer than that are happy in their work. Further, both of these goals are often outside our control. Finding a good job depends on time and place and economy. Finding love depends on time, place, and circumstance.

(5) To be a suitable meaning of life, I argue that it must be something that we can obtain through our own effort and which can only with great difficulty ever be taken from us. This is why Spinoza and others said education is the source of meaning: we can find it ourselves; and, once gained, it cannot be taken away.

I have already disputed love and work as sufficient answers, now I would like to dispute education, as much as I love it and worked hard for it for myself and for others. Education does not necessarily increase critical thinking, but it does seem to increase political awareness, enjoyment of culture, and to slow the instincts for violence. Yet, Germany at the time of the Nazi rise to power was among the most cultured and best educated nations in the world. Here, in the United States, even when the ratio of attained degrees is high, we have entered diplomatic and military endeavors that brought shame. Education, alone, does not protect us from silliness or misjudgment.

(6) Another commonly offered idea for ultimate meaning is religious faith. It is true that people of faith do find meaning and contentment in that faith, but there are so many different and different kinds of faith, that one is left asking which is the right one? Or, does having just any religion suffice? Interestingly, as religious as Viktor Frankl was, he never pressed religion upon others.

Huston Smith, the best known Twentieth Century expert on world religions, similarly to William James, defined religion as the trust in ultimate justice, which trust gives us strength and peace of mind. This is an appealing definition, but leaves us with the possibility of choosing a religion with a narrowly drawn sense of justice that looks to one's own betterment alone, or of a select few. Trust in ultimate justice for only a select few can lead to resentment and revenge. Self-defined justice can be a very selfish thing.

Finally, there are three things that are most often offered as suitable as a meaning of life: (7) wealth, (8) fame, and (9) falling in love. Each of these is especially popular in contemporary living.

(7) None of these met my standard of being in one's own control: wealth is often the result of luck more than work, and can be stolen or frittered away as quickly as it was gained.

Socrates and Spinoza were generally considered to have been impoverished or of only minimal income; yet, both excited their followers with their thought. They found, among other things, the secret we discuss below to the Meaning of Life.

(8) Fame depends on the attention of others, who can turn their attention away quickly and finally. Popularity is fleeting. Drama can entice briefly, but relying on the opinions of others robs one of self-esteem and of an inner life.

(9) Falling in love is particularly popular with poets and song-writers. Yet, falling in love is completely out of our control. We cannot just intend to fall in love with the next person we meet, because we cannot predict who that might be. We cannot choose to fall in love at one day and one hour. Time and place and circumstance for falling in love are outside our control.

Not only is gaining love outside our control, so is losing it. Poems and songs seem to spend as much time on love lost as they do on love gained. In truth, we know that one half of even the happiest couple is more likely to die before the other. The remaining partner is left with irreconcilable grief if their meaningfulness consisted solely in being in love with the other.

(10) What are we left with to answer our longing for meaning? Friendship. It is within our own grasp. We can attract good friends by being a good friend.

What are the qualities we want in a good friend? We can exhibit those in our own lives: loyalty, honesty, sincerity, dependability, kindness, empathy, and even a sense of humor. These are some of the qualities most of us admire. Surely, we can think of more. And surely, we can learn to conduct ourselves in these ways. So, gaining friendship can to a large extent be under our own control. We can choose good friends, we can be a good friend, and we can maintain long friendships. Yet, even if our friends may change or die, we still have the likelihood of gaining new friends. Many who report having long and happy marriages say that the basis of their marriage is friendship.

Friendship is a goal within our grasp and one that brings vast hours of contentment and meaningfulness. The quality of our lives, our work, our place of living, even our health, all are enhanced with the quality of our friendships.

A lifelong endeavor and pleasure, friendship is the meaning of life.